I Did That: Celebrating Yourself When You Finish Something Big with Ayana Major Bey

Hey y'.

All.Welcome and welcome back to noseyAF.I am your host and friend Stephanie Graham and I gotta tell you all today as this episode is being released October 20th.It's your girl's birthday.That's right.It's your girl's birthday.And what a blessing to be alive.What a dream.Thank you.Thank you so much.Thank you for listening and thank you for celebrating with me today.I also share my birthday with Vice President Kamala Harris who girl, we need her, don't we?The world is really lost its mind and I just wish she was here.I really do.Last year, or maybe it was two years ago now, Pastor Brian Kley, who also shares his birthday on October 20, prayed for us.I brought him in.Thank you again, Pastor for coming in to pray for our country.When we found out Vice President Kamala Harris would not be our president, it was a bummer.Also, today's birthday, Carlos Flores.So Kamala Harris, Brian Pusely, Carlos Flores, so many others.Snoop Dogg share this birthday and I also want to wish a happy birthday to other Libras out there and also to others who have a birthday today.I hope that you have a dreamy, dreamy, dreamy day.So check this out.Today on today's episode, I'm catching up with Ayana Major Bay who was last back on the show in July of 2025.Episode number 75.I will put her episode in the show notes along with Pastor Brian's episode in the show notes so that you can hear it.But Ayana is an actress, a voiceover artist, podcaster, mentor and what she calls a multi hyphenate creator.And she came back right as I was coming up for air after a very full summer.And if you've been with me, you know that I've probably spoken to it at length.This project, 31 Days of Black Business that I did over August.I also did a write up about experience in Lex Roman's Revenue Rule Breaker newsletter and so I will put that in the show notes as well.But Iyana came back and she and I talk about how to celebrate yourself when you finish something big and not just move on to the next thing, which I so easily do.We get into the bare minimum baddie philosophy that she and I, you know, have dreamt up together and what it looks like to protect your time as a freelancer and why showing up for your work doesn't mean running yourself into the ground.I love Ayana so much.She is so wise, so talented.She had created her own cabaret that she, you know, wrote, produced, directed all herself, obviously with help.And that's what we talked about when she came on episode 79.But this time, it's sort of like a shoot the breeze, artist to artist conversation.And we talk about 31 days.We talk about her project.We talk about her podcast, the artist pivot.And I adore this talk so much, and I hope you will too.I hope you put it on the background as you're making moves today in the studio, on a walk, doing dishes, kicking it wherever you might be.Ayana also gets into something that I feel really sits with me.I have a lot of notes from this episode, but the idea of separating your artistry from capitalism and what does it mean to make work just because you want to, not because you need it to pay the bills.So we talk about that too.So if you've been grinding and forgetting to stop and say, I did that, this episode is for you.So happy birthday to me.Happy birthday to Vice president Kamala Harris.Happy birthday to Brian Pusgley.Happy birthday to Carlos Flores.Happy birthday to you.So let's get into it.Let's play the theme song and get into the conversation with Ayana.Major Bay.Thank you so much for listening to nocif.Gotta get up, get up tell the whole world you a winner winner vision of a star with a mission in the cause what you doing?How you doing?What you doing and who you are?Flex yourself and press yourself Check yourself don't work yourself if you know me then you know that I be knowing what's up.Hey, Stephanie.Graham is nosey as Ayana.Welcome back to noseyAF.

Thank you.Thank you so much.I'm happy to be back.

I'm so glad you're here.Oh, my gosh.It's been a little minute.

It has.

How have you been?

It has.You know what?I've been all right.I've been all right.And I'm gonna give you my catchphrase when people ask me that question, like, how have you been?What are you up to?Like, what's going on?I say I am intentionally finding my joy every day while surviving these people's capitalism, period.Nothing less, nothing more, period.That's all I got for you, so you could do with that answer what you will, but I'm out here finding joy while I got to surv this system I live in.Yeah, that's it.

That's so real, man.I had just put on threads that I wanted to talk to someone about how does one find joy?Or, you know, what, actually not find joy?How does one celebrate?That's what it is.

Okay.

Because I feel like, you know, as I have completed this.This podcast series, this 31 Days of Black Business, and I was just like, onto the next thing.I'm just like, okay, that's done.Now let's go on.

You didn't take a moment to celebrate.

No.

Say I did that.

No, other people said it, you know, And I'm like, wow.I'm like, yeah, I guess you're right.I guess you're right.

Yeah.

Yeah.And I blame that on working in film.And I wonder if you can relate to this.Being an actress.I feel lying.After that commercial job is done, after that movie job is done, even before it ends, people are already searching for the next thing.

Yes.Because that's how our industry is set up.It's like, I guess I'm working a job, but I have to continue auditioning so that when this show closes, I gotta.I gotta.Next show.

Roll back to the next one.Yeah, yeah.

And, like, we'll have part of it.

Yeah.And then we'll have, like, the wrap party.And we're like, well, that's good.We can have, like, you know, free drinks and cocktails, but we're up the next day either going back to work to wrap out a job or, you know, people taking the kids to school or doing laundry.It's just like, yeah.

Mm, mm.No, I think that's part of the mindset, Stephanie.And it's like, we have to counteract that on purpose.Right.Like, no, I'm gonna sit and celebrate this.I did that.

Right.

Pat myself on the back.

Yeah.How do you celebrate?

Oh, varying things.

Okay.

I. I would say my.The first thing that's coming to mind is I'll literally just go buy a mini bottle of champagne.

Okay.

Like, I'll just sit with my little single glass.I bought this glass from.It's like a thrift store, I guess it's called.What is it called?Rehab.

Okay.Oh, rehoming.Is it like rehome or Rehome rehab?

What is it called?Re.Something.

Okay.

I was with my best friend and I saw this.This like.Like champagne flute, but it was only one of them.It had, like, etched glass in it.I was like, oh, this is well made.Like, this is from somebody's house way back when.And I was like, oh, there's only one.And I remember him telling me, well, you can buy it for yourself.Like, this is your celebratory.Glass.Cause it's only one.So I did end up buying the glass, and I have it in my cabinet.So, like, I just pull the glass out and have a little bit of champagne or whatever I have in the house.And I'm like, no, I want to toast to myself because I did that.Or, like, I'll celebrate.I'll get.Maybe I have a sweet tooth and I know this.So I on purpose don't buy sweets.I don't have them in the house.Cause I'll eat them.So I'll go buy sweets.Like, I'll go get, like, one of my favorite ice creams is.I am dairy free now.So I do vegan ice cream.Van Leeuwen.I don't know if you've heard of that brand.

No, I haven't.

And they're really exp.They're really.Like, one scoop of ice cream in the shop is $9.

Wow.Okay.Van Dang.

They're expensive, so that's a treat for me.

Right?

So I'm like, no, I'm gonna go get a scoop of this vegan strawberry matcha ice cream that I like.Right.Wow.So I do things like that that I don't do on a regular basis.Cause I'm just like, my wallet's like, that's cute, girl.But we not spending $9 on one scoop of ice cream very often.

Right?

We're not gonna do that.

Definitely not.Yeah.

Yeah.

That's what I mean.

So things like that is how I celebrate.Okay.

I like that.You know what?An image is coming in my head.I don't remember if I was at a party or what, but I do remember seeing a young lady walk around and, like, she sat down and I saw.And I.And I can, like, vividly see her unwrapping the foil, like, about to have, like, a little personal bottle of champagne.I was like, wow.I didn't even know that they had that.Maybe we were in a lounge or something and she had ordered it.And I was like, I didn't even know that you could buy single bottles like that.I think that was my first time seeing that.Okay, I'm gonna take that.I like that idea.

Yes, please do.

I like that idea a lot.

Yeah.Yes.You just sit and cheers to yourself.You literally pat yourself on the back.Be like, I did that and I'm proud of myself.And cheers.

Okay.Hey, actually, what are you celebrating these days?Speaking of?If we could just keep on that thing.

Ooh, ooh, ooh.What?What are.What am I celebrating?These days, huh?That's a very good question.Let's see.

Take your time.

I think what I'm celebrating is.

Me.

Putting one foot in front of the other.

Yeah.

Like, if I'm honest, putting one foot in front of the other because it's.And I think that's where, like, my answer, like I said earlier, is coming from.Like, intentionally finding my joy.Like, I'm celebrating myself for keeping that intention and putting one foot in front of the other every day.And, like, finding things that literally bring me joy.Like today, my sister came over.Just like.She's like, are you home?I'm like, I am, actually.She came over.We were kikiing in the kitchen.Like, that's my joy for the today.Right?Like, just, like, an impromptu visit from my sister.But, like, acknowledging those things.Right?Because we can also take those things for granted.And so it's like, no, I just had a nice moment with my sister, like, just kikiing in the kitchen.And so I think I'm celebrating.I'm celebrating the acknowledgement and the intention of the joy, but also slowing down enough, Right.Being present.I'm celebrating being present in my life and in the things that, like, bring me joy.Because it's like we live in a duality, right.The world is in turmoil.

Certainly is.

Mind you, I had this conversation with someone the other day, and I was like, but the world's been in turmoil since its inception.So, like, it's always been in turmoil.This is just our version of turmoil.I just wanna, like, acknowledge that.But with that, human beings have still found a way to, like, celebrate.There's still weddings and baby showers and parties and all of this stuff, right?So it's.Yeah.I'm celebrating myself for keeping my intention of being present and finding my joy every day.

I love that.It seems, like, so simple, but yet also sort of hard.Because it seems.Even though it's like, obviously when we walk, you know, we put one foot in front of the other, you know.You know, some of us that can do that or however you move, it's always, you know, something going in front of the other and.Yeah.Being present.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.It's hard.

Yeah.

There's so many distractions in this world.It's hard to be present.But I think that intention, I think, is also what helps you put one foot in front of the other.Right.Like, I'm not gonna lose hope.That's what I'm not gonna do.You won't break my soul.I literally play that song every day.Me and Beyonce be in my room just twerking so you won't break my soul.Because I refuse.I refuse.

I love that.I think I might add that song to my playlist.Last time I feel like I saw that you had went to the Beyonce concert.Cowboy Cowder.I went to that too.But you were dressed up, I think.Oh my God, child.My outfit was just so mid.It was a T shirt.

Uh huh.

That said.What did it say?It had like some protest saying, like ghetto until proven fashionable.Something along those lines.And then I put a bandana around my neck and I said that I'm just like a farmhand.I have my hair braided like this.And I just say, you know what?I just work.I just work at the.Wherever anybody's doing the cowboy stuff.I work there.

I work there.

I just work there.

That's it.Listen, listen, do what you do.

I.

It was just my inner theater kid came out.

No, I thought it was very fun.Oh, did you really?Wow.

Yes.My denim hat, I made.I cut up those patches of fabric and then did the patchwork on my hat.My cowgirl hat, if you will.

Amazing.The sash, amazing.Amazing.

Like, yes.And I got to wear it twice.Cause I went twice.

Oh, wow.

Here in Jersey.And then I went in Paris.

Oh, no way.Wow.

I was in Paris on Juneteenth.Okay.It was a vibe.

Wow.

It was a vibe.

Amazing.Amazing.Yeah.I definitely enjoyed the pump and circumstance of it all, you know, But I just felt like I'm like, okay, my budget living sustainably.I bet not.I better not try to go and get anything else outside of what's in my closet.

Hello.Cause you'll make it work.You will make it work.What's in your closet?Okay.

Yeah.And I participated.I did, I participated.

You did participate.Because there are people who did not.

Yeah, yeah.

Like, but how could you.How could you show up for our queen and you didn't participate?

You know, the thing I wonder is, did she ask people to dress up or did people just do that on their own?

Oh, no, honey, we did that on our own.

I love that on our own.That's cool.No, that's cool.

Well.Cause it's coming off of Renaissance.Because remember Renaissance, we just kind of did that on our own.Right.

People did that on their own too.Right?

We did it on our own.And then.But then she asked.Towards the end of Renaissance, she asked for silver, if you all will wear silver.Because when I went the second time, I intentionally wore silver the first time.I was just glitter.Okay.The second time, she had asked by then, can y' all do me a favor and wear silver?So then that's when the silver popped up.Cause she asked, and then Cowboy Carter came around, and it's like, why would we not dress up?

Like, what?Yeah.Yeah.I love that.That's so cool.You know, I think I really like Beyonce a lot.I'm not a member of the Beehive.My girlfriend is, who always.I always go with her, so I enjoy seeing all of that.So I went to Renaissance, and then she took me to Cowboy Carter as well.

Yeah.Yes.Yes.

Oh, my gosh.

That's joy, too, right?

Yeah.Yeah.

That's like, yes.The world is on fire.And I'm finna twerking Beyonce.Okay.

Period.

Cause two things could be true at the same time.

Yeah.The world is on fire.And yet we are still, like you said, having our babies, making our projects, going to work and doing all the things.Yeah.How was your summer?

Oh, mine was good.It was.Well, you know, I'm here in Jersey, so I got to experience the FIFA madness.

Okay, cool.

Yes.Yes.So I actually worked an event.I wasn't at MetLife Stadium, the main stadium.I was at Sports Illustrated.So I got to work for a company and be at.Basically, that was the fan zone.So those people who didn't have tickets to get into the stadium went to the secondary stadium and watched.Like, it was a watch party, and there was food and events, and so it was a lot of fun.So my summer was mostly.Mostly things like that with FIFA.And again, finding my joy.Like, oh, I'm gonna go.I'm gonna sit on the porch and eat my lunch.Cause it's really nice outside.I'm gonna go to the beach this morning.Cause I have some time, right?Like, I'm about an hour drive away from the closest beach to me.So I was like, you know what?I have three hours, or technically four hours.I'm going to drive to the beach.I'm just going to sit and read a book.So I was trying to do things like that in between.In between work.No travel this summer.But because my wallet was like, where you want to travel to work?Is that where you.That's where you need to go?That's where you go.That's where you need to travel to work.So it was good.It was good.Yeah.But how was your summer?

Oh, my gosh.This summer was intense.I feel like, you know, I had this ambition to work on this project, the Black Business project.And then I had all that planned.I went to Detroit, which I had never been to before, for Midway, which is sort of like an artist.They don't call it a conference.I think they call it like sort of like a summit or a convening where it's basically like artists who also have artist run spaces in the Midwest.So two years ago it was in Kansas, this year it was in Detroit.And that was a lot of fun.And I go there on behalf of nosey af.

Yes.

Yeah.So that was cool.And then, you know, when I got back, my intention was to work all on the series.And then I got called for a movie gig, period.Which.Which.Thank you, Lord.

Amen.

The child, the hours.

Oh.

While I also.Because it was children, so.Which you would have thought made it a little bit lighter, but I think they were trying to compress everything to do before the kids went back to school.

Oh yeah.

So we were just like on go time, you know, working with like homeowners that are friends of the director, you know, on their schedule, things like that.And it was off the chain and I was like, oh my gosh, should I call off this project?But I said, I'm a G, I'mma get it done.And I walked and I walked out and I walked out.I feel came into September like with like, you know, I feel like I have like the vision of like a.

Cloud of smoke dissipating.Uh huh.

Yep.And it's just like coming out, you know, it's like, it's like you walked in the club where everybody smokes and you like where you at, where you at.But you know, you gotta still dance and kick it and party.You can't leave out of there.Cause you came for a good time.

Uh huh.Uh huh.Yes.

And now when you're coming out, it's.

Like I had my good time.

That was something.

That's how I'm leaving.Yes, that was something.

Yeah,.

That was something.But you made it to the other side of that.

Made it to the other side.Praise God.

Amen.Okay, but now I have a question though.

Okay.

Because this sounds like you weren't being a bare minimum baddie, because I want to bring that up because the last time we talked, yes.We were like, but bare minimum.Even though our bare minimum is still more than other people's bare minimum.

Right.

But like, were you.Cause I know you had to make it through this movie.

No, I wanted to ask you about the bare minimum baddie, which it seems like you've been upholding to.

Yeah.

I have to be honest.I need to check back in.

Check, honey, check back in.Because I have a post it note right here on my computer that says, bare minimum, baddie.

Yup.

Like, don't do too much, Iyanna, because you're already a person who does a lot.So again, my.Let's say my bare minimum.Okay, let's say I was giving a hundred percent.When I'm like, no, I'm gonna give you 65%.My 65% is still greater than some people's 100%.

Right.

So, yeah, I'm doing a bare minimum.Like, I'm not doing any extra effort.I'm doing what the assignment is called for.If I'm working an event, if I'm a pa, if I'm.Whatever I'm at.What is.What is the extra?I mean.I mean, what.What is the assignment?No extra.Right.Because I can take initiative, but I'm not going to.

Yeah.

Tell me what the assignment is.

I feel like I definitely did not adhere to that at all.And you know what?I think, because I had finished working on a TV show and had a break, and that's where I was like, okay, the series will be that bare minimum.As I, you know, I have a little project, I'm good, and as long as I don't get called for anything else, I'm cool.And then the call came in.Now, the one thing that I think kept me on it was because it was black business.If it would have been, oh, yeah, I'm talking to, like, a bunch of cheerleaders of all ages, sizes, whatever colors, maybe I would have been like, hey, y', all, we gonna push this to the fall.My bad.You know, this happened.I work freelance, y' all understand.But I'm like, you know what?I've already said I'm gonna do this.The applications are coming in.I'm starting emails.You know, I wanna see this through for.For us, for the culture, for my people, you know?And so I feel like even though I come out, I'm coming out the club, sort of like, I'm sort of tired.I have that conflict of saying that because I'm like, but this was for us.

Yes.

You know?

Yes.

So.

No, I get it.

Yeah.

So, yeah, so it's.And it's fine.There are seasons, I think, where you're like, okay, I gotta put my bare minimum.Baddie cape down.

Yeah.

But that's fine, right?You gonna pick it back up this fall?You go pick it back up.

I'm Gonna pick it back up now.I did think, to think, oh, should my bare minimum baddie reset be instead of working in movies, maybe I need to go sit down somewhere and write some insurance claims or I need to answer somebody's phone at an office and I could do move my art practice, you know, till afterwards, like I've done.Cause again, cause the film, you know, in theater, all these, you know, visual career, visual arts careers have so many hours attached to them.Just full stop.It's like you bring.It brings on your life.And I do not like the piece of freelancing where you can be going along with your projects and boom, you're just snapped out of it because you get called for a job.That is so jarring.And I felt that this, I felt that this time around.

This time, yeah.Working on the project.Project, yeah, yeah.And would you say that was like the hardest part of this project?That it was like you were doing it and then you were like, oh, shoot, wait, I have to make an adjustment.

The hardest part, I think, was.The cadence and using my off days.The editing.The editing.That's it.That's all.That's it, that's all.Because obviously I don't have a problem talking to these, to everybody.Everybody is perfect and great and I learned so much and I'm so excited about everybody I spoke to and even like some of the, you know, smaller relationships that just.That just sort of come up just naturally in our conversation and, you know, talking on Instagram and stuff.I love all of that.But child, that editing, editing, girl,.

That's for the birds.Somebody else do it.Cause I don't want to.

Man, I was waking up.We had our off days.We worked on the weekends too, on this project.But the off days that we did have, I felt like I was just back on another film set.I woke up, you know, got dressed, you know, took a shower, dressed, you know, like Jill Scott.

Like Jill, yes.

And I got to it, you know, I got to editing, you know, and I got into a rhythm a little bit.Like I would do conversation.Like, I would be like, okay, Ted's edit's done.All right, now let me go to some mountains.Okay, now let me go to Tiffany's, you know, and I got in a groove.And then I would bring them all into GarageBand.And then I would take my time and I record everybody's intro, you know, Like I was sort of chained.I was chain ganging it after a while.At first I was like taking everybody through the whole process.Yeah, but then I was like, wait a minute.I already got this set up here.I could just work smarter, not harder, period.Come on.Okay, maybe that could be a tenant of the bare minimum baddie.

That is a tenant of the bare minimum baddie.Work smarter, not harder, not harder.

So after I discovered that, oh, that was, you know, that was the move that got me going.But it still, you know, it was a long time.Cause it was 31 people, 33 even.Cause then some people came back like, hey, sorry, I was out of town.You still down?I was like, hey, you know what?

Why not?

Why not?Let's get it going.Let's get it going.So that sort of took me back out, my cadence to go back in to interview people.Cause at that point, I was finishing, but I said, hey, you know what?I'm on a roll.I'm on a roll.

Yeah, yeah, that's fair.That's fair.Okay, okay.What made you decide to do the 31 days, like, of black business?

Yeah.So I was speaking to Denzel Turner, who was the first episode he had came to this fellowship.I had to talk to all of the folks in the fellowship about maybe considering having a podcast to speak about their projects.It was a fellowship about just change makers.There's people who are like, activists working with the youth, a food, food, desert, that kind of thing, all sorts of things.And so he offered, like, one on ones.I said, okay.So he was telling me about his pod, his project, which is called Black Fridays, where he interviews a lot of business owners in Detroit, where he's from.

Okay.

So he was telling me.We were just shooting the breeze.And he was telling me how August is Black Business Month.Okay, cool.I was like, well, I didn't even know that we had a black business month, did you?

No, No, I did not, actually.

Yeah.So then I'm like, okay.And so we were just get throwing back ideas around that.Now fast forward to it was just August.No.Was it August?Yeah, maybe it was August, July.It was summertime.It was just hot.And I'm just in the house hot, being like, man, I need to take off.Like, I was.It was already.That was a busy season, too.I don't know how the black business popped in my mind, but I was interested in just trying to find to take some time off of August.Like, let me get ahead of myself so I can actually have a break.Because you know how it is.Podcasts, they always talk about, we want to keep the feed warm, have our content for our folks, you know, Be able to.So I'm like, what can I do?And I just thought, oh, my gosh, what if I, you know, talk to black business owners?And then that way if somebody's in Virginia, they got an ice cream shop, we could go visit them.Or if they, if they have a, you know, if they have a bookstore in Miami, we can go to that.Like, it can become like a little directory and it'll just be fun.I was just, I'll make it an event.I'm gonna make my off time an event.And so, yeah, that's just how it came about.And I thought, I like that idea of it being niche.I had heard several times, creators, Michelle Jackson, Angela Hallowell, I think Angela, she has a project called Please Hustle Responsibly.She was on the podcast in the past and Melanin mvp, she did a.And I think still does a daily podcast series.And Michelle had also did a daily podcast.Everybody said, look, this is hard.So I knew it was hard, but I said, you know what?If I give myself enough time and pace myself, this is a piece of cake and child.So I guess the.I wanted to take off some time and also make an event.And I thought, what better way to just shout out black folks?You know, August is Black Business Month.That's the dead of summer.I'll be able to be off, you know, and that's why.Yeah, I feel like sometimes I wonder if folks think like, it should have been more powerful than that.Like, oh, I want to uplift.Like, I'm here to uplift our community.But I'm like, I was just looking for.I needed a project to take off and I thought this would be dope because, you know, I always wanna support black business.So who's out there?Correct.

Yeah, correct.Like, but I.But I. I beg to argue that isn't that uplifting that you want to support these black businesses?So you're doing it in the way, you know how, like, you have a podcast and you're like, I would like to feature you.So that's what I'm going to do.And so I think the intention to do it is in turn then uplifts.Like, I think we kind of get into this.Like, well, I'm doing it to uplift this and do this and do that.Okay, well, let's rein it back.Let's go back to the bare minimum.Baddie.Yeah, rein it back.No, why are you actually doing this?Because that will then uplift somebody.That will then give somebody some inspiration that Will then like, no.What is your true intention behind this?Yeah, you were like, I just wanted to feature people.I wanted to talk to people.I'm, I'm curious.I'm nosey.

Right.

Like, you're like, hello, hello.This is what.So I want to talk to you.And within that, then you get featured and you get exposure and then you do get uplifted because people find out about you and they're like, oh, that's so interesting.I didn't, I didn't know this.People wouldn't have this information without you then interviewing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.And I wouldn't have known these people either, you know, which has also been awesome.You know, I love, I really love everybody's.Everybody's ideas and their projects and their businesses.

Yeah.

Some of it's like, some of it's like, why didn't I think of that now?

Why did I think of that?Right.But listen, I always think it's timing and life circumstance.Oh, yeah, that's why you didn't think about.You're like, oh, no, that makes sense that that person would have develops that.That makes so much sense.

Absolutely.And then as you, you know, hear people talk, as I know you do, you know, with the artist pivot, you're like, oh, that's why I'm, I'm not doing that.You know, this is their business.This is for them.

Correct.That's their lane.

That's their lane.

I'm staying in my lane, period.

Yeah.

Now I can look to their lane,.

But I got to stay in mine and take inspiration.

Right, Correct.

And just be like, okay.And just be in conversation with their lanes.Right.We just, we flowing through.

We flowing.We're in, we're on the 6th.We're on that highway.We're all just flowing.We're all just trying to flow and find our way.And you have conversation with that.Okay, go ahead, I'll let you over.

Uh huh.

Come on.Like, but you gotta stay in your lane.

Yep.

Yeah, yeah.So then I have a question.How did you find all of these business owners?

Okay, so I had a few that I knew already.Like here in Chicago, there's a restaurant that just opened up on the south side, Park Manor 75.I had knew Charlotte and Jacari, who are the owners, just like through socially.And so when I, and I had been following them, you know, working on bringing this restaurant to life.So I already knew when I thought to do this, I was like, okay, I'm gonna ask them.I asked my hairstylist, you Know, which was awesome because I feel like we only have the relationship of, like, client stylist, you know, I mean, obviously we shoot the breeze, but, like, she didn't even know I had a podcast, you know.

Okay, yeah.

And was sort of like, I'll do this for you.Yeah, sure.You know?

Yeah, yeah.

Same thing with my.With the handyman who comes and just, you know, does installations, put in the air conditioner.So I sort of started with people that I knew and then asking friends and whatnot.And then I put it on Threads.Mm.

Okay.

Let me tell you, Threads was pivotal in this project.

Yes.

I put it out there.Like, hey, y', all, I'm doing this project, you know, I'm trying to feature 31 businesses.Let me know if you're down.Like, all you have to do is just, you know, fill out this form.I made a form and people started tagging like, oh, yeah, you need to talk to Blue.Boom, boom, boom, boom.And just tagging people.I was like, okay, fill out the form, fill out the form, fill out the form.And the next thing you know, my inbox, my little form I made, was filled with folks.

Wow.

I was like, wow, see, that is wild.Cause I only had, like, a handful and I.And I also knew some business owners who I could ask, but I'm like, let me try to fill this up, because I feel like it's so easy to just work within your network.And I'm like, let me go outside of the network.And baby, Threads made the network, period.They really did.

I love that.

Yeah.I was so shocked, especially because I'm like, oh, social media.

Mm.Mm.Love, hate, relationship.

Absolutely.But I say Mark Zuckerberg and his chain, they did that.

Yeah, right?Yeah.For this project.They did that.

They did.Right.For this particular work.Yeah.He said, let me.Let me get.Let me set.Step up for success.

Mm.Mm.

Yeah.

Yes.

Yeah.So that's where I got a lot of the people outside of, like, the handful of, like, you know, folks that already knew that I asked.Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.So that was awesome.

That.That is awesome.And that just goes back to, like, the.The phrase that I, you know, all those sayings that, that our.Our older, Our elders used to say that now, you know, we're women of a certain age.They're starting to make sense now.

Uh huh.

The one that I'm thinking about is closed mouths don't get fed.

Yeah.

So you had to speak.You had to be like, hey, I'm gonna.Yes.You asked the people you knew Right.Your hairdresser and your handyman and the restaurant owners.But then you're like, you know what?Let me make this announcement on threads and see what happens.Yeah, you opened your mouth.

Yeah.

Here we are.

Here we are.Here we are.Amazing.Yeah.

Amazing.Amazing.Okay, so then I have another question.You had all these incredible guests.Did anything, like, surprise you about your guests?

Oh, my gosh.So much of business is like art, girl.I'm like, am I talking to artists or am I talking to business owners?

Both one and the same.

Yup.A hundred percent.All the same needs.We need the same things.We need money.We need staff.We need marketing.We need visibility.You know, we need work, life, balance.Give it to us.All of us.We need it, you know?And, yeah, that.That I think really surprised me the most.And I think, too, I was also sort of surprised with, you know, folks of all levels of business saying, yeah, I'll be on the show.I'll do it.Yeah, you know, that I thought was really surprising.And then what else?Because, you know, some of the folks have been in business a long time, you know, and it's like, oh, wow, this is cool, you know, that you said yes to come to come on my project.Because to me, it's like, oh, this is my project.Y' all are doing me a favor, because I have this idea.I need to fill it with people.Y' all are the people.So thank you.And I think another thing, too, that was just sort of surprising.It's just like, how many ideas we all still have even while just having our business.So, like, I think of, you know, Cheryl Hodges from the Obsidian Book Archive.She was like, yeah, I have the bookstore.And then I want to have, you know, it was online bookstore, fantasy bookstore.And then she wants to have a bookstore.Brick and mortar.Brick and mortar bookstore.But then she's like, I'm going to film school.

Yes.

And I'm like, okay, okay.And then, you know, and then just talking about, you know, being a mother of, you know, special needs, son.I think her son maybe had autism.Sorry if that wasn't the right thing, but I think it was so just like, all the different lanes that folks have or if people have been in business for a long time, you know, Simone Boyer from Cocolux, which, by the way, this is.I have it right here, her candle.Let me tell you, this product.It was a body butter, and she has fragrance.Man, please.This is some.This is some rich stuff right here.Yeah, this is some rich stuff.I bought a flight of her body, Butters.I'm like, let me check this out.You know, we all, you know, sisters.We like to smell good.

We sure do.

You know, we don't play that soft skin, all that.We don't play.

Cause that's one thing you can guarantee a black woman will do.Oh, yeah, okay.She will waft past you, period.Okay.That is.You can guarantee that.

And let me tell you, I'm not even trying to be a.A.What is it?A commercial.But, you know, Simone spoke so excitingly about her products.It made me add to cart.

Hello.

And.But even her experience of, like, corporate America and then her.Her talk about now opening up this beauty brand and even being open for mentorship.I was like, you could be my mentor.All the experience that you speak from, so, you know, just like the edgy.And then also just black women, Black folks.You know, man, we are always so down.We are so educated, so creative.Just we are.You know, I guess that's not really a surprise, but, man, it was something.I was a reminder.Yes, it was a reminder, you know?Cause it's like you're doing all this stuff and you're like.And I will also a thing that surprised me was this sort of like corporate to entrepreneur pipeline.You know, a lot of folks had worked in corporate or had this day job for a minute.

Yeah.Yeah.

And then they break out and then start their own thing.

Yeah.

And I'm like, should I should.Should I have done that?

Right, right, right, right, right.Like, should I have followed?But here's the thing.Not everybody is fit to be a business owner.

Yeah, that's true.

So I think also that question is like, yeah, wait a minute.

Yeah.And also, even while I still say that, because when I say that, I think, oh, you know, now you got the capital to start your business.That might not necessarily always be true.

Yeah.

You know, because it's like, you still have a family, you know, depending on the business.It takes a lot of capital to start up.So a lot of this is still risk taking, you know.

1,000%.Yeah, 1,000%.And like, like, you were saying how it's.You're like, am I speaking to artists?Am I like.Like, I had a episode just come out of the artist Pivot a couple weeks ago, and I was talking to.Her name is Michelle west, and she was a Broadway baddie.Like, okay, did.She's been in original Broadway cast.She's, like, made her principal debut.She's a dancer.She did like, is this the Audacity episode?On Broadway.No.

Oh, okay.Okay.

This is before this.This one is called.It's like Broadway to fitness CEO.

Oh, okay.Yes, with the abs.

Yes, with the abs.

The recent.

The recent.

Okay, Yes, I saw those.Come on.Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Okay.This is a black woman out here being fierce in fitness, period.

Yes, yes.

And she, like, basically, it was a hard pivot for her, but she was okay with that.Right.Because she just realized she had kind of reached her cap on Broadway because she was a dancer and she didn't have the prerogative or she didn't.She didn't think it was.She didn't feel or had the desire to be a Broadway leading lady.So she said, as a dancer, there's only gonna be so much money I'm gonna make.There's only gonna be so many roles for me, so I'm done.I did it.I was on the Tony Awards.I originated a Broadway cast.Now I'm moving on.Right.Wow.But her natural progression was through fitness because she used to train fellow dancers.

Oh, cool.

And then she kind of found the.If you will, the problem.Right.She was like, oh, there's a bit of a disconnect here with, yes, they're dancers, but their fitness is not necessary.Like, huh, there's something.They're asking me to train them.Yes.They're my fellow dancers, but they're asking me to train them in the gym.

Right.

So wait a minute.There's something here.And she wanted to.That she then was interested in bodybuilding, so she went into bodybuilding.And then from that, then she started coaching people.And that hobby turned into now her full fledged, like, business that she's.

No way.Wow.

Doing called be a nutrition.

Okay.

And it's all around health.Right?Yeah.Not just fitness, but, like, people eating.And.And, and because a lot of it, you know, it's what we eat.Has a big, big, like, proponent in how healthy we are.

Right, right.They say abs are made in the kitchen.

Yeah.And they.And they say it for a reason.They say it's.It's part of.Yes.Exercise and sleep, but also your diet is a big part.

Yeah.

So for her, I was asking her about her transferable skills.Right.And she was talking about, like, Iyanna, if you look at it, the grit, the persistence, you know, the time, the showing up constantly, the putting yourself out there as an actor to book shows is the same thing I have to do as a CEO for my fitness business.

Wow.

They directly correlate.Like an acting career isn't Sunshine and rainbows.And neither is owning a business.Yeah, you have to show up daily.You have to have thick skin.You have to understand.I have to keep putting myself out there and keep.It's literally directly correlated with being an actor or being a performer, with owning a business.Right?

Yeah.

And so those transferable skills like you had mentioned, like, am I talking to artists?You're.I mean, in a way, kind of, sort of.Because we have that same.Like this is freelance.It's a little bit unstable.But like, if you keep showing up, there is some type of.Some type of return you will get.Right now we don't.Unfortunately, we don't know the return because we don't have a stable paycheck.Like if we were working a 9 to 5.But if you do keep showing up, whether it's in acting, whether it's owning your own business, there will be some type of return.You just don't know it is.And that's the hardest part of living in a capitalist society where I need these green coupons to go to the grocery store.

Yeah, yeah.No, that's so real.That's like.Yeah, we gotta keep showing up, you know, no off days.How do we keep showing up as bare minimum baddies, you think?

I think actually now that you say there's no off days, I wanna, I wanna counter that.I think showing up as a bare minimum baddie is planning your off days.

Okay.

Because I'm about to go into a stretch of like five days.Like I'm working an event here in the city and it's gonna.I'm.I am looking at 12 to 14 hour days.Like I'd be on a film set.Right?

Yeah, yeah.

And I've literally booked out the Friday I took the day off.After those five days, I, as a person, as a human as.I'm gonna need that.Yeah, I'm gonna need that.

Yeah.For real.

So I think that's part of it.And I.And not shaming yourself because actually I was speaking about this to a mentee.I think it was yesterday.Because she's having a problem with resting.Right.Yeah.And she's in her 20s.And I'm like, baby girl, I got some years on you.But no.

Yeah, right.

I know.

That's like my daughter.Okay.

Like girls.

Yes.

But you have to understand, we were taught this especially as women as well.

Right.

We're in a society that praises continual work.We are in systems that literally is built off the backs of.Of in work of enslaved people.So that whole feeling Guilty.For resting is in kind of the patchwork of this country and of the society.And you have to combat that.Your body is your temple.Your body is the precious gift that you get to experience this earth in.Right.

Yeah.

So you have to take care of it.And, yes, I understand.The reality is we all need these green coupons.That's what I call money, y'.All.So if you.

Yeah, you hear me.

That's.

You know, I'm glad you said that.Cause I was with you.I knew.But, yeah, maybe our dear listeners may.

Not know, but that's what I'm.That's what I call money.Cause that's all it is.It's paper, period.That we choose to believe in, which we could also choose not to believe in.But that's a whole thing.But they're invented green coupons.I am.I am acknowledging the fact that we need them.You cannot have housing or food or anything.I am acknowledging that.And within that, you have to take care of yourself.You have to rest.You have to challenge the guilty mindset when you're like, I'm just sitting here.Yes.And just sit there, or don't overbook yourself.Like, she was talking about, like, oh, I had to do lunch and I had to meal prep.But this meeting came up, and so I took it, and I was like, could you have met with this person in a day or two?She's like, yeah.I'm like, okay, so when you schedule.Put laundry on your Google calendar.

Put.

Put meal prep on your Google calendar.Guess what?You are busy doing laundry and meal prepping.That is important.

Yeah.

You can schedule the meeting for two days later.Right.So I think that's also part of the bare minimum, because y' all are not going to kill me.My ancestors worked too hard for me to have choice.I am going to participate and work and be in this capitalism.And I'm also gonna sit my butt down.

Yeah.

And I'm gonna take a nap, and I' ma rest.And I'm a meditate and I'm a color, and I'm a go have lunch with a friend.And I'm gonna just sit on the porch and look at the trees.

Yeah.

Like.And yes.And guess what?Work through the feelings of guilt.Cause I had to.I'm still working through my feelings of guilt sometimes when I'm like, I'm just sitting here, and I have to kind of gentle parent myself and be like, yes, yes, Iyana, you are just sitting there.And so you should rest for the next 10 minutes.And just sit here and let your mind wander.

Yeah, no, that's so smart.And I've gotten better with stuff like that too, where it's like, okay, you have your dinner.Just sit and eat your dinner.Or, you know, oh, don't multitask.Yeah, don't multitask.Or, okay, now you finished your dinner.Housewives came on.Let's go watch Housewives and just chill, you know, like, you don't have to bring your laptop, you don't need to talk on the phone.Just wait, just chill and enjoy yourself.And I feel like coming on the other side of this, that has been more precious.Like, I have a art exhibition that now that I was, you know, was awarded.Right.I'm excited about that.

Yeah.

February.So now I'm like, okay, let me look at the podcast and see how I can maintain it.But I don't need to.Obviously I'm not going as hard as a 31 day series or anything like that.But so that I can focus on this.I'm not trying to do it all as if, you know, I'm a little CNN over here.

Correct, correct.

You know, correct.

Yes, I do know.And I think that's part of it too.Like the not multitasking, doing one thing at a time.Right.Whether it's personally or business wise.Like, I'm just gonna eat my dinner, I'm not gonna be on my phone, I'm not gonna.I'm just gonna eat dinner and then I'm gonna go watch some tv.Like one thing at a time.And yes, I know as freelancers, projects can come up and sometimes you're like, oh, shoot, I do have to do like these three things at a time.

And yeah, yeah, it happens.

But I think the baseline should be like, I'm working on this one thing and then when it's done, I'll pick up the next thing.Right?Like, I think that's.That has to be part of it.It has to be.

When I started noseyAF, I did have these ideas for these themes too where like, I'm like, let me work on the theme and like these five episodes.But when I first started the show, I was, oh, I can't keep like a bi weekly cadence up.But like series, I'm always looking for someone or whatever.What I liked is now, you know, I do like that model of going forward.Like, hey, the next series is all theater kids.Let me talk to theater kids for like, whatever.Like even look, three episodes.Okay, let me get my three theater kids to interview and then I'll put those out and sort of maybe structure it like that.So it did remind me of sort of like that framework that I had, especially now at, like, you know, 100 plus episodes.I know you have too.You know, when we have that now, it's like, okay, we can revisit some of these, you know, exchange episodes to put on our feeds and keep it, like, keep it light, you know, keep it smooth.

Really keep it smooth and keep it going.Keep it consistent, Right?Yeah, like, keep it consistent and in your own way.Because also life lifes and we're human beings, and we're not.We're not machines.We're not the big conglomerates that have all of these people working to keep the thing going.

Actually, let me ask you this.Do you find the artist pivot a part of your, like, practice, or do you see it separate?Because I've been like, I see nosey AF in my practices on, like, an ongoing thing.How do you see the artist pivot?

Well, that's a very good question.I do see it a bit as part of my practice.

Yeah.

And it's one of those.For me, it's one of those.It's a project that I just love because I wish I had it when I was a younger.A young.A younger actress.

Yeah, yeah.

Just venturing out into the world.But I will say.Cause I talked about this with, I think, a guest who's coming up on the show.The world was a different place when I graduated and came into the.The finding my way.And so I know that I have to be.I have to give that version of me grace.Right.Like, we're at a completely different time.But for me, the podcast is one of those.It's part of my practice because I'm just like, no.I have so many people to talk to and so many perspectives.Right.Because I think that's also the thing with the artist pivot.People are going to do what they feel called to do with their artistry.Right.And so, for instance, like Michelle, she said, I'm done.I'm now a fitness trainer, and I love it.And she's a bodybuilder.

Wow.

And she gets her little 10 minutes on stage and she's like, okay, I'm done.Right.But then I have other people who are like, no, this is what I am doing with my life.And now am I pivoting to maybe go into corporate for a little while?For the money and the money alone?

Yes.Yeah.

But also, I have to deal with my ego.That's A little bruised, but also then I go, yes, your ego is bruised, but are you looking at the world?This is not happening just to you.You're not alone.There are lots of artists who have to pivot right now.And some may pivot and never come back.Some are pivoting for a little while, but also you don't know where the pivot can lead you.It can lead you to a business, it can lead you even to a part time job that you're able to keep while you're auditioning that you actually like.Right.So it's one of those, like, it's a practice for me, but also just reminds me of like, everybody has a different path, everybody has a different lane.And like, I want to highlight that and talk about that and like how we survive.This is pivoting because just look at time, like we, we survive by pivoting, but especially as artists.It's also, for me, encouraging other people to continue because the world needs artists.Like, the world would be a bland place without theater and film and tv.

Absolutely.

And the art that's hanging on your wall and the furniture that you sit on, remember that's designed by an artist too.Right.Like the things that are the clothes, the fashion designers like, ah, that's art too.I mean, like, listen, your plates.

Okay.

Your honey, your plates.Okay.When you're in a restaurant, the food that goes on the plates, because that's technically culinary arts.

Yes, it is.Yes, it is.Yes, it is.

The world would be a bland place without creators.

Yeah.

So I think it's that like the artist pivot for me is like, okay, I gotta talk to these creators and let somebody else know in the world.You're not alone.Like, it's real hard right now.And it's like I just need somebody to give me green coupons so that I can go to the grocery store so that I can continue making my stuff.

Yeah.

And I think for me personally, it's a lot of like, I wanna get to the point where.And I'm already, you know, kind of there, but like, I want to be there even more.Separating my artistry from capitalism doesn't mean I won't perform again, but it does mean that I want to make my money some other way so that it's not dependent on this fickle industry.And honestly, every industry is fickle because every industry is made up.But the arts seem to be the very, very fickle.And so how do I separate my creativity?Because I still want to create.I am still blessed with talents That I want to share.But how do I separate it from capital?How do I separate it from making my livelihood off of it?Because in this moment in the world, it's not feasible.Doesn't mean it won't be again.Cause things can change.But how for me personally, how do I get a little bit more stability so that I can be free enough to create?I'm not stressed about money.So that I can sit down and you know, maybe work on revamping my cabaret.I can work on like these different things that I want to create.Oh, you know that music video I had this idea for?

You know what?

I do have the budget.I'm just gonna produce it myself.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's getting to that.

Yeah.

I'll audition for somebody else's show.Great.Yeah, done.If I'm cast, wonderful.Let's do it.But how do I get to the point where I just produce it for myself and I make it because I want to make it and that is it.It's not about the money.It's not about, oh, I gotta make sure I make all of this money back.Would it be great if I did?Absolutely.But it's about getting the art and the piece out there.

Yeah.

And I wanna have the money to do that.

Yeah, yeah.That's really, really good.I put down, I was writing how to separate my art from capitalism.A bible study.I'm gonna figure out, see what I could pull around that.Cause seriously.

No, seriously, like, because all we're taught is the capitalism piece of it.But like, what if your art and gifts aren't for consumption?What if I'm just doing.Cause someone asked me, like, what did you get out of your cabaret?I did it.That's what I did.The thing.That's what I got out of it.Like, I have a video.I'm like, I'm so proud of my.You put together a 75 minute cabaret.

You really did.

Loved it.

Yeah, they did.You had a whole team.You produced.You were the star of it.

Yes, I was the star.I was the producer.

Producer.

I'm tired thinking about that.One of my good friends is a producer and she was like, you know, I'll help you next time.I said, please, sis, please.

Yeah, yeah.

But I did it.That is the point of this.I did it.

Yeah.

And again, if I could separate the capitalism piece from it, just produce it.Because I want to produce it.And if I get the money back, great.But if I don't, great, Because I did the thing, the thing happened it's in the world.

And I think that that could be another tenant.Just that you did it is the celebration.Right.Like, it's like.It doesn't have to be some philosophical thought around the songs that you selected and pulling it back into scripture passages of, you know, any of your guided texts.

Yes.

You know, you did it because you also.You wanted to.You wanted to.So you did.

So I did.

Yeah.

And that's it.And I think it's that, like, we could even take it back to the beginning of this episode, Stephanie.Of, like, what's the simple thing?

Yeah.

What's the simplest thing?And just do it.

And you know what?

Yeah.

Maybe for us and other artists, the simplest thing is I'm gonna do a cabaret.

Yeah.

It's gonna be a simple thing, just.Cause that's what the.That's.That's who you are as a maker, you know?So.Yeah.

Or I'm just put my art up.I'm just.You know what?I'm gonna rent a studio space for the night.Y' all come see my artwork.

Yep.

Yeah, I did it.I let people see it.

Right?Yeah, exactly.Exactly.Our job is to make the thing and put it out there and tell people about it.

Repeat.

And the response from that.That's.

That's on them.That's on the people who see it,.

For the people who see it, you know?

Mm.But you did the thing.

Yeah.Oh, my goodness.Yeah.What a full conversation.

I know.Mm.A full and yummy conversation.

Yeah.You know, Is there anything you want to say before we call.Call this time complete?

Oh, anything I want to say?Anything I want to say, child, to anybody who's listening, just keep doing you.

Yeah.

Like, I. I've just gotten to the point in my life where it's like, I'm not going to be anybody else but me.And if you don't like it, so be it.And if you do like it, I love it.Come be in my circle.

Yeah.

But that.That, for me pertains to everything, like, how I move as a person.Right.Or singing musical theater songs at the top of my lungs.Right.Or like.Or, like, even, like, dating.Like, I am who I am.This is my personality, and I love it.I love it here.So don't come over here thinking you gonna change me.

Stay over there, please.

Stay over there.And you can observe if you like, but don't come over here trying to disturb my peace.So that's what I would say.I would say, like, everybody, just be who you are and like.And that's it.But like, also, you can listen to my podcast, right?

Like, yeah, absolutely.

Come on over to the Artist Pivot.That's what it's called on Instagram, the Artist Pivot.You could also go to my website, ayanabay.com podcast.It's there as well.I have a personal Instagram.Ayana Mbay.Follow me.See what I'm doing.I do, y'.All.I'm a multi hyphenate creator.

Yes, you are.

It was kind of going into the direction of like event producer and planning.

Oh, really?Okay.

Yeah, because it's kind of a natural segue.I've been the producer.Producer.Yeah.But the party planner for my family since I can remember.Right.And everybody's like, ayanna, you're talented at this.Like, you have the mind, like, you're pulling all of your skills from theater as well.Right?

Yeah.

To put these parties and events together.So for me it's that like, I'm a production assistant with a producing company now for events and like, I'm naturally heading in that direction.And I'm trying to be open to opportunities because I'm still auditioning.Right.But as I just said a moment ago, I'm trying to separate my artistry and my creativity from capitalism.So if I can make my money in the more event planning and event producing space, so be it.So that then I can create the music video I want, I can produce the cabaret I want.I could still, you know, I'm a voiceover artist, so I still do voiceover auditions, but.But I can audition without being attached to the outcome, right?Yeah, because the outcome is I want to book it because I need the money.But if I can get to the point where it's like, oh, I'm auditioning because this is fun.This is cute.I thank my agent for sending it to me, but then I submit my audition and I keep it moving.Right.Because I'm not attached to the outcome of booking it so I can make the money.So that's where I'm heading.But yeah, like, you know, all of my multi hyphens, actress, voiceover artist, podcaster, mentor, all of the things.

You're an award winning podcast too, by the way.Let's not.

You know what?Thank you.I'm gonna.I am an award winner.

Two time.

Two time.

Come on.

Two time.

Yes.

Call it one two, two time signal.Award winning podcast.

Yeah.Amazing.

Yes.Thank you, thank you, thank you.So, girl, I'm out here just trying.I'm out here trying to be me.Yeah, that's it.And that's what I say.Leave with the folks.Be you.

That's it.That's all.

Mm.

Oh, my gosh.Ayana, thank you so much for being on Nosy AF with me today.I love talking to you.

I love talking to you, sis.Like, thank you.Thank you for the.For the invite back.You know, I come on anytime we talk.

Absolutely.I would love that.This has been another episode of Nosy AF where we have conversations about art, activism, and social change.I'm your host, Stephanie Graham.I hope you took something away from today.Maybe an idea, a feeling to sit with or just a good time.And honestly, I'm always here for a good time.Quick thank yous go out to Queen Lex and Freddie Bam Fam for the nosey AF theme music and Emma McElrick for cover art and branding.And that's the show friends.Until next time, Stay curious and take care by.